Charles Kennedy - no, surely not?

With the news that the Lib Dems have started telecanvassing up Ross, Skye and Lochaber way, speculation has been rife that Charlie Kennedy might be winging his way to Europe next year when Mandelson's term as Commissioner comes to an end.

An interesting thought, very interesting.

It has been trumped, however, by a far juicier piece of speculation which goes like this:

Wise heads have clanged together at Demmery Towers and the collective chin-stroking has set many a-pondering what is to become of them all.

Polling indicates that nearly 90% of Lib Dem supporters want a referendum on independence and that almost three quarters of those supporters would vote "yes". Those who actually have some democratic principles within them wonder why the Lib Dems oppose a referendum and similarly wonder at the strange hostility shown by the party to the Scottish Government while appearing very comfortable sitting alongside Labour.

It's become clear to the grey bearded ones that there's little liberal and precious little democratic about the performance of the Lib Dem group in the Scottish Parliament and the performance of the three leadership contenders is so woeful that it's close to being painful.

Tavish Scott, the most talented of the three, is, it would seem, furious with Ross Finnie for having has the temerity to stand against him and has taken to using every opportunity to remind Lib Dem members of Mr Finnie's unfortunate resemblance to the comedy character Captain Mainwaring from Dad's Army. Since he all but ignores the Rumbling One and is not proposing any new policy ideas (perish the thought), Tavish's campaign is descending into a most unsavoury circle.

Ross Finnie, who sailed through his Ministerial career without ever touching the sides, is finding it difficult to convey his message about what his leadership would mean and has found himself left with just a few vague phrases that he hopes will chime. His candid comments about the Lib Dems just not being relevant to the Scottish people have ruffled a few feathers (truth is not always welcomed), and his admission that the Scottish Lib Dems under his leadership would merely ape the antics of their counterparts in London have irked the federalist tendency in his party.

Mike Rumbles, pet eejit of the Lib Dems is bouncing all over the place on nearly everything. Like Ross Finnie, he has pointed out to his party that they don't connect at all with the people of Scotland and that there seems to be little point in voting Lib Dem. He wants to move his party away from the impotent oppositionism that it's got used to over the past 15 months and has suggested the radical policy of voting for things that they believe in - even if those things are proposed by the SNP.

In addition to this eye-watering nonsense, the wise women and men of the Lib Dems are despairing of the clutching at straws and bizarre claims of their candidates (some have even been stupid enough to argue that losing their deposit in Glasgow East puts them in a strong position to win other seats) and are fed up with using untruthful claims in leaflets. In short, they have decided to realign their party with the Scottish people.

The way, they think, to do that is to bring someone with a bit of substance into the leadership of the Scottish Lib Dems - and who better than Charlie Kennedy?

So the plan is (whisper it) - parachute young Kennedy into the Scottish Parliament in John Farquhar Munro's seat, nudge aside whoever is standing in his way as leader, get down to some serious politics instead of the guff we've heard so far, and have a fantastic party to celebrate getting it right.

Just speculation at the moment, but is a better idea than carrying on as they are.

Mind how you go!

For those whom God to ruin has design'd, He fits for fate, and first destroys their mind.

Ach well, OK, since you ask, I did see Andy Kerr's profile thingummybob in the Scotland on Sunday. It struck me that Labour's real problems were caught in precis in one sentence:

I still strongly believe that we are the natural party for Scotland; we have just lost our way, disconnected with people.

That complacent arrogance of imaging themselves to be the natural party of government in Scotland contained in the first clause of the sentence is the cause of the lament "we have just lost our way, disconnected with people."

With another of Labour's leadership contenders proving that he doesn't understand what has happened to Labour, the future looks rather bleak for that once proud and powerful party. Unless Cathy Jamieson has something of greater substance to offer there would appear to be no brake on the coming descent of the Labour Party in Scotland.

The Sleep of Reason Brings Forth Monsters

Much tickled in the park am I by Labour's teenage angst, but I promise not to mention it except to say *ahem*:

Iain Gray on introducing mandatory ID cards to curb under-age drinking. If Mr Gray had bothered to ask anyone who had worked in an off-sales he would have been told that the majority of alcohol drunk by under-age people is purchased for them by people a couple of years older than them, few off-licences are plagued by young people seeking to purchase. How do I know? I used to be such an employee.

Iain's comments include these:

"It would also help protect retail workers who have to make difficult judgments about age and face disciplinary action or even the sack if they get it wrong."

Well, actually, prosecution for a criminal offence for selling alcohol to a person under 18 years of age - or for selling alcohol to a person who you can reasonably suspect of being intent on supplying it to someone who is under 18 years of age. Policing the second of these is what gives retailers and their staffs such difficulties - and one of the reasons why raising the age to 21 will help shop staff since 21 year-olds will be allowed to purchase for 18 year-olds but are most unlikely to get involved in supplying alcohol to anyone more than those three years younger than them. Unfair on 18 year-olds? No more unfair than any other restriction we put on people in our society.

Let's not go into the ID card debate itself at the moment, we can love that later. I hear that Iain had his website bought in November of last year as he prepared a leadership challenge. Don't say I didn't warn you.

In the same edition of The Herald, Tom Harris, one of Gordon Brown's Ministers laid out why he thought that Iain Gray, should he win his current battle, shouldn't have any more oomph than Wendy Alexander had. Let's have a wee laugh, here's a few bits:

Under such an arrangement, Labour MPs at Westminster would owe allegiance not to the Prime Minister but to the Scottish leader, and would, presumably, be mandated to support policies on reserved matters that were developed, not on a UK basis, but entirely in Scotland.

Apart from my immediate wish to say "remember the days when Labour MPs owed allegiance to the people who elected them", which I will, of course, resist, is this an admission that Labour's policies, developed 'on a UK basis', don't take Scotland into account? I've often said this was the case but it's better when Labour admits it.

By framing all policies, and not just those which are devolved to Scotland, at a Scottish party level, we would be undermining the very institution that we, the Labour Party, created in 1999.

I'm the kind of chap who thinks that it was the Scottish people who created devolution, but even if we were to give credit to politicians, surely all of those politicians who campaigned for a "yes yes" can take credit - and certainly the Lib Dems? The real point, though, is how would a change in the internal workings of the Labour party undermine the Scottish Parliament? Labour's sheer contempt for the democratic processes of this country is shocking, and this particular view is another indication of the way in which Labour politicians regard Scotland as their property - one of the reasons Glasgow East was won by the SNP. Scotland will, I hope, continue to punish politicians who show contempt for us.

Relations between Labour's MPs and its MSPs have never been healthier. MPs, still in government at a UK level, are nevertheless in no doubt that their own political fortunes are inextricably linked with those of our Holyrood colleagues, and share their determination to make sure that our current state of opposition is a temporary one.

A state of denial which will damage Labour, quite possibly consigning Labour in England to a generation in the wilderness. In Scotland it will be far, far worse - it quite possibly signals the end of the Labour party in Scotland. It's been teetering for a while but the tumble has started now and it will gather pace - unless Labour has the foresight to move away from being the least devolved of all the UK parties operating in Scotland and divorce the Scottish wing of the party from what's left down south.

Labour appears, if I may quote a chap who grew up on a croft called 'Loot', to be "in office but not in power". It's not that Labour MPs' political fortunes are inextricably linked with those of Labour MSPs, it's that the MSPs were the first to feel the judgement of the Scottish people.

As I said before, Brown must be dreading becoming Labour's John Major.

Trams - another cost

In the midst of all the chaos caused by the tram works, there's a story or two which needs to be highlighted.

Lothian Buses, the publicly-owned company which runs the best bus service in the country has warned that its previous growth in passenger numbers (which had been quite stunning) has stalled.

Passenger numbers on the services actually owned by the people of Edinburgh have actually dropped by 5% this year - in spite of the cost of fuel encouraging more people onto buses elsewhere in the country.

The cause - tramworks.

As a result, Lothian Buses will have to cut services to stave off losses. What a result for trams - far from encouraging more people onto public transport, they're putting people off.

This on top of the disastrous effects on businesses along the tram routes so far should be a serious warning about what is likely to happen to Edinburgh over the next three years as this white elephant of a vanity project continues to come off the rails.

I predict more bad tram news coming soon.

That's what I meant to say

At the opening of the Redbraes Community Garden there was a performance by the Grassroots Theatre Company of Zimbabwe - they were fabulous, and I intended to post the details of their Edinburgh shows here.

Having lost the flier that was handed out, though, I can't remember all the details - only that they're performing at the Columcille Centre in Newbattle Terrace. If I can find those details again I'll post them here.

Well done Redbraes

Redbraes Community Garden opened yesterday. It's an excellent piece of work by the local community and congratulations should go to everyone involved.

There has to be special mention, I think, of Simon, the local police officer (community policing at its best) who is one of the main driving forces behind the effort, and to the garden planner (I think her name is Becky). A nod, too, in the direction of the Botanics which supported the work, and to a well-known local supermarket which supplied the refreshments for the opening.

It's the people of Redbraes who should be most proud, though. It may only just be getting started, but the garden looks wonderful already.

A vicious retort

I hear from my very best sources (my imagination) that Gordon Brown is to wreak a terrible revenge upon David 'is it my turn yet' Miliband for his breathtaking duplicity.

With Labour's membership in Scotland down to 8,932 causing problems in Brown's back yard, Labour facing bankruptcy and languishing behind the SNP in polls in Scotland and behind the Conservatives in polls in England, Brown could have done without the hassle caused by this young turk's ambition unfettered by talent.

Brown, I believe, is about to play the dirtiest trick possible on Miliband - he's about to make him Chancellor ...

Is it siblicide time?

You know those times when you look away?

There's a scene in The Wind that Shakes the Barley where fingernails are being pulled out with pliers and an entire cinema crowd turns away at once. Gentlemen and less gentlemen will acknowledge a blow to another's anatomy which makes you seek to cover your own delicate areas.

That kind of "there but for the" feeling is what many non-Labour political types will be feeling right now. Miliband's wee tantrum rebellion turns out to be more than a wee tantrum with rumours of the ghost of Christmas past backing it along with other "colleagues". When the outriders turn their attention in concert to the target, it's fair to assume that the bunker has been occupied and there's about to be blood on the family heirlooms - Miliband is unlikely to survive the fallout but it will be messy.

I did love the charming naivety of the Home Secretary when talking about the possibility of a challenge to Brown:

"I don't think that's what we want at a time when people are worried about the economy."

On top of that there's the continuing financial crisis at Labour UK (£19 million in debt - £19 million!) which threatens to send the whole of the party careering into oblivion. It got so bad that the Labour party in Scotland had no dinner in all of 2006, according to note 6 on page 13 of the annual accounts.

Then there's the collapse in their membership - sitting at 158,868 UK-wide at the end of June this year, compared to 407,000 in 1997 - a drop of 61% in 11 years. They don't publish Scottish figures, but a population share of their UK figure, assuming Scotland to be 9% of the UK population would give them 14,298 members - the same size as the SNP except that the SNP is increasing in size and Labour is shrinking.

Looking at Labour's Scottish accounts, however, tells a different story - membership and subscription fees for Scotland fell from £123,076 in 2006 to £114,403 in 2007. That figure includes "Fees received from MPs and MSPs", but that isn't quantified, so we'll have to treat the whole lot as membership income. Labour's membership fees are £36 a year with a concessionary rate of £12 a year. If every member paid the full rate there would be 3,178 Labour members in Scotland; if every member paid the concession there would be 9,534 Labour members in Scotland. The true figure will be somewhere in between (remembering that there will also be an adjustment for MPs and MSPs). No wonder Labour membership numbers in Scotland are secret.

Just to compound the woe, Cathy Jamieson, so far the most competent of Labour's Scottish leadership hopefuls, made a right pigs ear of a press conference, and Andy Kerr turned into Sherlock Holmes:

"What I have learned is that there are a multitude of reasons why people have become disillusioned and have either not turned out to vote or have voted against us,"

By far the worst start, however, was made by Iain Gray - he's got the support of George Foulkes and Rhona Brankin.

These are the old heads on young shoulders, the creme de la creme of Labour - such little spark!

I think that this Labour councillor is right

Labour Councillor Elizabeth Maginnis has a piece on her blog where she asks a very sensible question:

why are we spending money improving bus routes that nobody wants into the Waterfront (Newhaven Road) when we can't afford much wanted improvements to pedestrian routes?

A fine question - especially if you ask the same about trams:

Why are we spending half a billion pounds (£500,000,000.00) on trams to the Waterfront that nobody wants when there are lots of other spending areas which would use the money far more appropriately?

Well done Councillor Maginnis!

Disaster for Scotland

Helen Eadie has betrayed her loyal fans!

Just when we were all gearing up for the gruelling campaign ahead, she's gone and went and done it and turned up to support thon Catherine Jamieson.

I'm gutted.

We'll have to cancel the rally - the banner's wasted.

Those T-shirts won't be any use to anybody anymore.

What a pity - I'm sure our support could have done it for her.