Kenny MacAskill MSP, Cabinet Secretary for Justice, launched some anti-submarine technology on Friday - in Partick subway station. Don't worry down there on the clockwork satsuma, it's not about to flood and The Nautilus isn't likely to be coming the other way, it's all about metal detectors! No, no, not the ones you see people using in fields wearing headphones and an intense look that suggests that Roman legionnaires buried their treasure here last week, these detectors are for knives.
High-tech equipment to help the police in the detection of carriers of bladed weapons, the Ferroguard poles come from a system which was developed to help with safety in MRI suites using technology which was developed to detect submarines.
Not only will it help the police to detect those carrying weapons to allow them to decide what the risk to public safety is and take appropriate action, it also means that no-one will be able to carry concealed submarines in Scotland! A result all round.
Mind how you beep!